Finally,

I  looked in the mirror at myself and said “I love you”.

It takes a lot of courage for some, others it may not…I have no idea. The only way I have ever felt was weird about doing something like this. Talking in the mirror to practice something, sure. Talking out loud to yourself I even understood. But saying things like, “I love you” to yourself? That seemed really odd for me.

It was always something I knew I should do more. It’s so hard to build up the courage to say that to friends, even loved ones sometimes…and I really didn’t even consider myself as someone I should say it to. Lucky for me, I have been blessed with great friends and family over the years. A good friend once recommended Louise Hay. She is a wonderful woman who speaks affirmations and gives great life advice through her books and meditations. She helped me heal, and taught me great lessons about life- impacting my personal growth significantly. This all quite recently, too. In the last few years of my adolescent life, I refused to look in the mirror and truly smile at me being me. There was always something to pick at, something to criticize. I noticed this often in my peers as well. It’s sad when young men and women grow up feeling so insecure and critical of themselves. At some point, the development of getting to know who you really are gets muddled with the version of yourself that is a feign…you become the person you think others want you to be. I don’t feel like I was ever really comfortable with myself, I didn’t know who I was. This last summer of 2016, I spent a lot of time alone and got to know myself. I moved into a new house, worked out often in the sun, went out with friends and tried to heal. I even started this blog during that time.

Now, I am happier than I could have ever imagined in the past years of my life. If I could talk to my former self, I would simply hug her and console her. I would assure her it’s possible to love yourself, and really mean it. There is no greater gift than that ability, because for most, it is too hard.

People are beautiful, complicated creatures. They deserve to make mistakes and heal. They are allowed to express themselves and be individuals. I wish I could share my experiences only to help others understand that even though it feels like we are alone, stuck and tired of our trials which seem never-ending, we are not alone at all.

When you learn to manifest your own destiny and share your love with others, it comes back tenfold. The best we can do in this life, and no matter what comes afterwards, is to try our best to bring each other up.

Life can be an exciting adventure. If we let the universe teach us its lessons, we can become more aware of our potential. I strongly believe in meditation and yoga. I have slowly begun practicing both for a while now and I can tell how much it has changed my life significantly. Meditation has brought me the gifts of cosmic knowledge, as hippy-dippy that sounds, it’s something like nothing else. Religious people have their beliefs, this is the holistic spiritual version I suppose. Yoga has helped me calm my mind, and teach my body to be patient. It helps you slow down your world, and really focus on the moment.

My favorite type of yoga is hot, simply because it forces you to focus and work the body. When you feel your muscles flex and start to ease, you want to push harder because it feels good! I love the challenge of meditation because it takes you out of your body and allows you to spend time in the quiet space of your mind. Often when I take short naps, I go into a more meditative state, where my body becomes completely numb, but my mind is still aware. I am peaceful and feel relaxed, but if one were to talk near me, I would hear him and become aware of what he is talking about. I feel like it has taken me years to  understand what mediation does for oneself. It’s almost too weird to explain the type of change it brings to ones life, but it is a beautiful, unique practice.

I am so grateful to reflect often and notice how lovely life really is. We have to take it slow and not get discouraged-especially in this day and age. More than ever before, I feel determined to share my love with all those around me. The world can seem like a scary place unless we learn to understand how it works. And if we all stick together to build a more aware, compassionate world, it will happen soon enough.

namaste

fullsizerender-18

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s